Father of the Year

by Sidney Delorean

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When looking for a dude to take me home to bone,
My motto always is “go old or go home”
I’ll take Roger Sterling, you can have Donald Draper
In the morning bring my baby his slippers and the paper
Old men find me novel, They don’t mind I’m offbeat
When they laugh at my jokes, it shows crow’s feet
The balls may swing, but the dick’s still tight
I wanna give ‘em my earthly delights
They got an empty nest, their kids are off at college
It really is the best, you must acknowledge
Their parents are dead, no pesky in-laws
No awkward dinners, no Sea Bass faux pas
I like a man who owns his home
Pay that mortgage, make me moan
Old dudes will treat you you nice, cuz you aren’t their ex wife
They wanna keep you around for the rest of their life
(you know, cuz it won’t be that long)

Your dad is hot your dad’s legit I wanna ride on that daddy dick
Your dad is hot your dad is fly, and I don’t see the point in being shy

I couldn’t help but notice that your dad’s pretty hot
I’d like to feed him my apricot
I can’t be the first and I won’t be the last
To point out your dad he’s got a sweet ass
Not sorry if it’s awkward or if you oppose
But I gave him my number to see where it goes
Is there a fridge in the garage, that’s solely for beer
Or has he been in AA going on 20 years?
Does he go fly fishing, does he smoke on cigars,
Or is his pastime working on classic cars
Your dad is hot and I mean what I say
I wanna ride his face like every day
He lives in the moment, doesn’t care about memes
He listens to jazz, your dad is my wet dream
He’s been there done that, he has so much to say
And I’m a sucker for mental foreplay

Your dad is hot your dad’s legit I been ridin’ that daddy dick
Your dad is hot now he’s my man and he can’t get enough of my tasty pecan

When people see us out, they think he’s my dad
I find it hot, do you think that’s bad?
His hair’s in tact, he uses Rogaine
His wiry chest hair, it drives me insane
He’s got his own life, his own friends and hobbies
He knows who he is and that makes me soggy
No endless texts cuz he's got a landline
And eating me out is what he calls Face Time
When we go out to dinner, he’s not on his phone
That millennial shit, I just can’t condone
Knows how to eat pussy, it’s not his first time
Your dad’s oral skills are truly sublime
When we get married, you need to call me mom
I mean that shit, this ain’t a parody song

Your dad is hot your dad’s legit and I can’t get enough of that Daddy dick
Your dad is hot, that much is clear, and he fucks so good he wins father of the year


released October 28, 2016



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Sidney Delorean Phoenix, Arizona

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